Nice? Certainly not. Funny? Well, maybe a little. Everyone loved Miss Beck, but the woman did have a little junk in her trunk.
There have been others through the years. I know the real names of all but the first and last of the following folks, but for the rest, their made-up monikers are just as likely as their real ones to bring their faces to mind.
- Psycho Jogger: This guy used to run, morning and evening, through our old neighborhood. He avoided eye contact and when possible, ran oddly close to buildings, trekking along just an elbow’s width from their brickwork and making sharp turns at their corners. He had a distinct look—one that made all the mothers in town warn our kids to steer clear of him, though I don’t think we really needed to. He was a natural child-repellant.
- White Bread’s Mom: The whole family looks like they were born in polo shirts and perfectly pressed khakis. They’re very nice, but twenty bucks says White Bread’s mom picks up a loaf of squishy Wonder at the market every Saturday.
- Guts & Glory: This kid has no fear. None.
- The Inspector General: Don’t even try to hide anything from her. She will get to the bottom of it.
- Auntie Amway: She loved the stuff, she talked endlessly about the virtues of the stuff, she sold the stuff, she tried to recruit everyone she met to sell the stuff, and for your birthday, you could pretty much count on getting a package of the stuff.
- Nosemary: Her real name was Rosemary, but she knew everything about everyone in my childhood neighborhood.
- The Inbreeders: When they moved in, a neighbor noted that the mom and dad looked remarkably alike. They really did, and their kids seemed like what you might expect to be produced when cousins marry.
- Rico Suave: His wedding ring said he was married, but his look and demeanor said otherwise.
- The Leftover Hipppies: Neighbors. I dig ‘em.
- Spitter McGee: Sported a constant stream of drool and when you fed him a bottle, you could count on getting about half of it back.
- Never on a Monday: He’s scheduled to work Monday through Friday. He strongly prefers to start his workweeks on Tuesdays.
- Boobs, Hips, and Big Pouty Lips: She’s one of a kind.
I’m blogging my way from A-Z. Please check out some of the other A-Z’ers.
Post every day, that’s all you have to do: NaBloPoMo
One more thing: You wouldn’t like it if someone stole your words, so please don’t steal the work of photographers and graphic artists to provide images for your blog. Photo courtesy of Morgue File, which offers lots of wonderful, free images for public usage.